i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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