can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
