I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
