So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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