ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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