do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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