So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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