idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
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