not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Is it penis luge time yet?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize