ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
