Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
