I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
