Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
