it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
i drank out of a bidet.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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