Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize