Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize