You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
This is the high leading the old right now
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
