just tell him i said nine months
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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