this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
