i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
