ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
