i love accidental penises.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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