So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
