should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
