do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
