Cold hands, warm shart.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
