Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
