You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
