I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
