it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
