Those balls look pretty dangerous.
zippers are such a cool invention
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
