We're facebook friends in real life
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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