so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
