Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
