oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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