You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
should my penis look like a turkey
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
