dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
