We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
time to smoke my breakfast
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
