I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
