id be glad to
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
