good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
