im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
