hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
