its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
