I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Damn victory sex feels great
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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