so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
