you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
