We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
