You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
So much Jack, so little girl.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
