I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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